Tuesday, February 27, 2007

An open letter to the Universe:

Dear all-knowing, all-powerful formless substance,

As I hope you already know, I am working very hard at perfecting the art of positive thinking. I am meditating daily and making a conscious effort to emit only positive energy.

So far so good, Universe.
Thumbs up, really, I am all about the spiritual enlightenment.

But, here’s the deal, stupid people keep fucking up my chakra. How am I expected to find my way on the noble path when I keep having to hurdle dumbasses?
Come on, throw me a bone here woudja? I am trying really hard.

Ok, so honestly, how is this supposed to work? I’m supposed to love thy enemy and shit right? What if I said "I would LOVE for you to leave me the fuck alone."?
Does that count?
Or maybe… "I would LOVE it if you weren’t so damn stupid."??
Am I getting warmer?

I’ll bet people who live in those homemade 10’x14’ shacks out in the middle of the woods are super enlightened. They have nothing but the lack of amenities and furry woodland creatures to piss them off. Outside of the mail bomb thing Ted Kaczinski was probably close to shaman status, huh?

I read somewhere that gratitude was incredibly important to being at one with the Universe. (see! I’m reading and doing research! Give me a few spiritual brownie points for that) If my sideways approach to loving my enemy doesn’t work out for me, maybe gratitude will be the trick to my tolerance of them…..
I am eternally grateful for the stupidity of others as it makes me look that much smarter. I am so happy and grateful that every day my patience is growing as it is constantly being tested in some sort of maddening stupidity endurance trial.
How’s that work for ya? If I incorporate those words into my daily mantra, can you and me still be good? Please say yes, because I am beginning to see how old Teddy started thinking about wrapping up those special packages of his.

Your faithful student,

Post blog note..... I certainly hope the universe has a sense of humor.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

The ressurection of the blog

Poor blog.
Sadly, I have let’er go to the island of misfit blogs with all of the others that started out with the best intentions but were abandoned due to neglect. It’s not the blog’s fault. Blame the blogger. I have no excuse. I can't say that I have been too busy, because that would be a lie. I have been preoccupied with the couch and reruns of Top Chef.... But busy? Nah. To be honest, I did construct a few blog entries that I tried to post but I am too technically deficient to make them look the way I envisioned them to and I got frustrated and gave up. Typing and posting? Got that. Inserting photographs and attempting HTML? Not so much. In an abandoned file on my desktop contains all you need to know about our Halloween (yes, it has been since OCTOBER! since I last posted) our Thanksgiving, Christmas, and other life events, that started out as inspired blog posts and were left to perish in that sad lonely file.

But regardless of the reasons why or how my absence occured...I'm back baby!

2007 came along quick didn't it? And 2007 is the year I will turn 30. The Big Three Oh.

No better time to dive head first into the project that is “finding carrie”. And this web log can be a valuable tool. A ruler I shall use to measure progress, reflect change, and steer me back onto the path should I lose my way.

I have a whole lot going on in my life right now. I started my new job in December, and so far its cool. It sucks much less than the last job I had, thats for sure. (I wonder what those miserable cows are up to now? Choking on karma I hope) And I can see good things coming from this job. I might actually find out what I want to be when I grow up. That would be pretty cool.

My sister is having a baby! Definately look for future posts on this. I am up to my elbows in baby shower planning right now. I am way over the moon excited about becoming an aunt. I am going to spoil the crap out of this kid. Good stuff. I wish I was smart enough to share pictures.

what else?............ummmm. I will also post updates about the kids and homelife and such. I appologize to my friends and family members (and adoring fans) who use this blog to keep up to date with my goings on. I feel as though I have neglected you too.

I will do better.

Pinkie swear!